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Post by Ventia on Dec 21, 2015 10:17:28 GMT -5
( Voss if you want to reply. Sorry it's been so long.) It was late. Ivy had nightmares. Bad nightmares to the point she woke up crying. Something she hadn't done in a long time. Old memories. From Katie. Ivy clenched her eyes shut and pulled on her hair, trying to silence those deadly inner monsters. Trying to silence Katie. It was ok. She told herself, forcing herself to breathe. It was going to be ok. She was ok here. She got used to being with Voss. It was all ok. Ivy forced the need to go back down. Voss was right. She was hiding from herself. That's all she did these days. Hide. She missed him. Ivy would never allow herself to remember his name but God. God she missed him. He was her first love. And she missed him terribly. Her first real love. She rubbed her wrist. God. Make the pain go away. Please. Ivy forced herself off the bed, her shorts and T-shirt damped with her sweat. As always when she awoke, she checked on Jaimie first. He was still fast asleep, growing faster these days and more stronger (mostly due to Voss seeing as Ivy wanted to shelter him more) but still when he slept, Ivy saw the boyish features cling to his delicate face. For a few long moments she stayed by his doorway, just staring at him and then she moved back to her room. After a quick wash, Ivy tried going back to sleep. But after a good hour of tossing and turning in her bed, she decided that she just couldn't go back to slumber. In some ways, that was fine. She was afraid that if she did fall asleep, those same bittersweet memories would haunt her. So instead, she pulled on some shoes and headed out of her and Jaimie's room. She found herself moving towards Voss. He was really the only thing that was keeping her here-besides from Lottie of course. If Voss had never returned into her life, she wouldn't have ever been this close to home. But he had. And in some way, Ivy needed Voss. He was her first. So he raped her. But secretly she enjoyed it. It was a strange relationship that they had going on. But if Ivy was asked whom she was with? The answer might very well be Voss. Besides from the very first day where he had kissed her, they haven't so much as touched hands. Did she love him? She was still trying to figure that out. She hesitated in front of his room, laying her palm on the bare door and closing her eyes, breathing in his scent that seem to pulse outwards towards her. Her leg started to jump up and down and nervousness started to fill her. She breathed out slowly but it was still there. She sighed and then turned away and moved out all the way to the cave opening. Did he smell her? Maybe. Would he wake up and follow her if he did? She was almost positive. But strangely enough, Ivy never tried escaping. After all, she came here of her own free will. But there were sometimes where she just needed some time on her own. Well at least until Voss came looking for her. And she did want Voss to come after her. She didn't want to be alone anymore.
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Voss
Warrior
Confidence is not 'They will like me'. Confidence is I'll be fine if they don't.
Posts: 1,068
Pack Status: New Dawn, Other
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Post by Voss on Dec 21, 2015 10:52:43 GMT -5
Voss slumbered with Lottie at his back she occasionally still scratched at the wall, its looked like a cats scratching post and often needed to be changed. Her hands often bloody but tonight was a good night she slept hard from the tea he had made her, he had acquired it from his former Master through several chains of people. It was used to put one into a deep sleep and was brewed from witch's magic, he had not been in to deep of a sleep encase it was a ruse. So far it had worked and he seemed to start to relax into a deep sleep, being only a hour in before he smelled her. His Blazing red and orange eye popped up as his nose twitched, sitting up slowly he would look to Lottie.
When she didn't stir he would get up slowly moving to her trunk he had commissioned, opening it he would pull out a small little bunny. Placing it in her arms as if she was still a mere child, seeing her cling to it tightly made him relax as she breathed heavy because of the way she was curled up. He moved her around a bit and covered her further with a blanket before he leaned down and kissed her forehead. " Rest my little Lottie " He moved from her sliding the curtain closed around his bed, moving to get out of his sleeping cloths he would slide on a pair of jeans. He did not need his suits the burning with in him seemed more easy to control as of lately since Ivy (Katie..) had shown up. Turning his attention to the door he would slide it open sniffing the air, she had been there only moments before.
He would look back to the curtain before stepping out and sliding the door shut, walking barefoot down the tunnel following her scent. He seemed to take his time as if something might get in the way if he rushed it. Stepping to the mouth of the cave he would run a hand through his slightly longer hair, it had been a while since he had it cut. He had been far to busy with a lot of things, the silence of it all at night made him calm and things seemed less rushed. " Trouble sleeping?" He moved to lean on the wall looking out to see who was on patrol to night. He had no idea what to say to her or what she wanted him to say, he thought he had said all he needed to say several times.
Was that what she wanted? For him to confess his love over and over? This was something he doubted, though she might on some level enjoy hearing it. Action. Yes actions where louder then words, she seemed one for that being what said the most. Though he did know she at least wanted him near or she would not of come to his door, it was obvious to him with her scent being this strong. Or was it just him wanting it to be so? Usually when she wanted him near the more she tried to turn him away. That was what happened most of the time. He only saw a few people on watch tonight, this gave him a little concern, though he could smell more then he could see which eased him more quickly. He wanted his family to be save, that included Ivy ( Katie...) He had to think her real name to be able to swallow the lie she was pushing on him and others.
But he did respect her enough to never say it out loud any more, not even when he thought they were alone. He didn't want to risk the boy finding out her lie, that would fall on her when the time came. And once he was old enough it would, but the boys heart seemed as deep as a dark abyss in a good way. He always forgave easily and loved strongly, that he admired. He watched her waiting for her to speak to him in her famous fashion of avoidance, waiting for the dance they did do when they were around each other. She had berated him several times for what he had done to her, he would not take her like that again.
At the time he thought it had been because of lust, and admitting that she looked to beautiful to pass up would be true. But it was more then that he at the time did not understand the drive and need he had for her. It had never been like that with Cinder, though he had used her it had not been pleasant at all. With the one he pursued now it was like being lite afire from within, and at the rise at the end and fall it had been like floating securely. His life had not been secure since then, and though she stood by him and he felt more stable. It was not the same, and he knew why. The lie she kept telling her self, it kept him from being able to get close enough. And he kept telling himself he would not take her like that again, but some times he felt as if that's what she wanted.
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Post by Ventia on Dec 21, 2015 13:05:00 GMT -5
She was sitting on one of the various rocks just staring up at the sky. It was one of her favorite things she liked about living here. There wasn't that much lights out here so she could see the vast amount of stars. She always loved the night sky. Another memory slithered through her mind. Warm grass underneath her body. The scent of fresh water from the lake a few feet away from them. Warmth coming from her left side. Another being. She sucked in a breath. The stars twinkled back at her and the wind carried a boys voice to her.
Past and present clouded together and for a second she thought he had spoken but then that familiar scent wrapped around her and she relaxed in its familiarity. Voss. It was Voss whom had spoken. So he had come. Ivy smiled softly, grateful that he had come. She turned slightly, staring at him. From his bare feet all the way up to those burning eyes and long hair.
"Yes. Nightmares." She told him truthfully and continued to stare at him, he was beautiful. Hard. Strong. Even handsome. Scary too with those red and orange eyes of his. His face was so more familiar than his. Sometimes she forgot what he looked like. Well she did forget. There were only two things she could vividly picture. Those two colored eyes and the same tattoo that covered his wrist as it covered hers. But that was all. Everything else was so hazy. It was so long ago.
Yet. Here Voss was. His face was always refreshed in her memory. To the point that sometimes she'd worry when she saw a few more dark circles under his eyes. Or if his shoulders became too tense. Or if his body vibrated with emotions. She cared for Voss. Wasn't that enough? She could let go of the past. Couldn't she?
Silently Ivy moved away from the rock, moving towards Voss and his heat until she was but in front of him. She glanced up at him. Voss was so tall. Was he tall now? Didn't matter. Ivy reached up and hesitantly cupped Voss' cheek. Familiar heat eased into her skin and she smiled.
"I'm sorry if I woke you. I wanted some company to be honest. Is Lottie ok? Are you ok? You look a little weary." Ivy brushed her thumb along his cheekbone, concern filling her eyes. Yes. She did care for Voss. Even now, she worried for him.
After a few seconds she moved her hand away from his face and then tugged on his wrist. "Come with me? Well...can you just lay down with me? And hold me?"
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Voss
Warrior
Confidence is not 'They will like me'. Confidence is I'll be fine if they don't.
Posts: 1,068
Pack Status: New Dawn, Other
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Post by Voss on Dec 21, 2015 13:48:45 GMT -5
(If i over stepped my boundaries let me know and I will re write it)
Voss watched her his features neutral even when she looked to him, he tensed when she moved but he didn't move. When she walked all the way up to him and touched his cheek his eyes seemed to glint with a small bit of happiness before he smiled but it really was not a fully happy smile. He would lean his face a little as her hand slide down he would kiss her hand before he took in a breath and let it out slowly at first all he did to answer her questions was nod his head. Minutes ticked by before he would push off the wall to move beside her. " I am fine, just a little tired. Lottie can still some times be restless. So i spend a good amount of time watching over her."
He waited a few more moments listening to her speak about wanting him to hold her. Staring down into her eyes for a moment." Of course Ivy" He said softly Before he would suddenly scoop her up into his arms.He carried her close to his chest with his arm under her holding close.
When he moved it was steady and slow towards the rock she had been sitting on. Stopping at the bottom before jumped up on top through a series of jumps, till he was up on top of it setting her down. Then he would slowly lay down. " I see something bothering you more then nightmares. What is it?" He knew something was not right in some way or fashion, he knew she had nightmares. And yes not just about him. He would pull her close to him wanting her to snuggle to his chest his fingers gently move up along her back up under her night shirt, not because he wanted more but because he wanted to calm her and feel hear skin.
To sound self centered he thought no one else had been apart of her life, he knew nothing of any one else other then what she had told him or the smell of her mother as she had gone through his complex now home. His anger swelled deep in the pit of his stomach for a moment before it snuffed out quickly, taking his time to look at her. Her eyes never lied to him even when her lips did, that is how he could see the reality of it all.
He tried to think how she went from being near him that night like it was, to being frigidly clear to now again being hear him. It is like she wanted a soft and kind gentle man, something he could be at times. It was clear that he could or his daughter still would not be here, he wanted to know what she was thinking tonight for her to be this close to him. Had she finally had enough time to set through it all to finally want to be next to him like this always? Or was it something else?
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Post by Ventia on Jan 27, 2016 19:04:40 GMT -5
Ivy could only see Voss, so she noticed the glint in his gaze and the way he breathed out slowly. It affected her almost as much as the small kiss. She had so much things to say and yet she didn't at the same time. So she stayed quiet, frowning a little when he told her Lottie was still having trouble sleeping but since Ivy knew Lottie had her father, she wasn't that worried.
Ivy blushed a little when he picked her up, secretly enjoying the slight touches and the attention she was receiving from him. After being alone for so long, she craved someone's touch. Plus, she has a strange understanding with Voss. After all? She was here with him.
So she relished the feeling of being in someone's arms. Memories filled her of the past and of past daydreams but that wasn't reality. This? This was reality. This was real. This was right now. Right now she had Voss. He was holding her. If she closed her eyes and forced all the thoughts away, she could fool herself that she was really fine. That she was safe. Warm. Maybe even happy.
She almost pouted when they were at the top of the rock, enjoying his closeness. But then he pulled her close and she snuggled into his side and all was alright again. She didn't even need a blanket because he was warm. Incredibly warm that a part of her-the childish part that still lived inside her-wanted to rub her face against his chest and just feel his warmth envelop her.
And well. She did that. Closed her eyes and pressed her cheek into the side of his chest and just...breathed. For a few long seconds that's all she did, breathing in and out while feeling her cheek go warm and taking comfort in his fingers by her side. Another few more seconds ticked by and she moved closer, moving her arm so that she was half hugging him and absorbing more of his body heat. Her palm was flat against his heart and soon enough, she could feel it pulse beneath her and she breathed.
She felt calm.
After a few more silent minutes, Ivy licked her lips and told him the truth. "Memories. Just thinking of my past. My mom. My friends. My pack. The small things. I don't know. I just miss it. Them. My friend." Ivy opened her eyes and stared up at the stars. She loved it here because of the stars. She loved seeing them.
"I don't know. I'm afraid. I want to go back and try to patch things up. But it's been too long. And now I have Jaimie. And I didn't report what happened to Fallyn and my scent was all over her blood that was left there. So I don't know if they think I had something to do with her accident. And even then, I should have reported it to them so at least they know where she is and that she's not completely dead...sorry. You don't even know whom I'm talking about. She was a pack mate. Very pretty. Jaimie's biological mother. She was always kind to me and my brother whilst growing up. Sometimes when mom was working too much in the office, I would get tired of being cooped up there so me and Jareth would start to explore the pack house and well Fallyn would be there sometimes. Just sitting by the fire. Reading and drinking a cup of chocolate and she'd see us and make us chocolate and tell us funny stories about this guy she liked and just random things that went through her life." Ivy blushed, feeling like she was talking more than she was supposed to, "point is, she was kind. Like Jaimie. And I should have told them. But I didn't. Because of my own problems. So. It's too late."
Ivy shrugged. "I just missed them. It doesn't matter. Jaimie is happy here, so I'm happy."
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Voss
Warrior
Confidence is not 'They will like me'. Confidence is I'll be fine if they don't.
Posts: 1,068
Pack Status: New Dawn, Other
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Post by Voss on Jan 27, 2016 19:38:10 GMT -5
Voss would smile as she snuggled in close taking breaths slowly and calmly, his eyes would look up at the stars for a moment. He thought the silence would never break till she surprised him and spoke. He would listen for as long as she spoke, letting what she all had to say sink in. He smiled a chuckle growling in his throat ". Well.." He paused thinking being he spoke, he still worried what he might say would have her closing that wall in again.
" I think if you need to go back and be that person you should. No reason you can not still report in. I am sure the alpha will understand if you explain things. " Him wanting her to stay was not going to cloud what he had to say. " You are always welcome here, but if there is something you feel you must do then do so." He knew her saying she was happy here didn't mean she was fully happy here, things left unsaid or done will cloud someones vision for a long time.
His warmth expanded a little as his arm held her as close as possible," But I know you, you will say that there is no need. " He couldn't help but laugh again " Jamie would be safe there as well. I am surely happy you are here, but i will not hold you from looking else where " He said, she had cut things from her self and pushed what had happen aside. He was fooling himself if he thought she was not afraid of him in some form. " I ..I think it would be something to think about at least " He said softly his grip never lessened on her, but his heart beat sped up for a little bit before calming back down to a slowed rhythm. " Jamie is still young..he will be happy where ever you are.."
~*~
Lottie curled up more not feeling the warmth of her father any more which woke her, she sat up rubbing her eyes. This night was going better then the others, she decided to get up and go to the kitchen to get something to eat. She was craving something chocolate, her steps were slow and tired. She wondered if the stash of hot cocoa was still in the kitchen, she had seen La La put it away. Wondering where the people that had come with Katie where all so, it had been a little while since she had seen them in the commons area. It was like they were ghosts all most, she wondered if they had gone exploring in the many cave tunnels yet. She wondered about a lot of things. Though she wondered if she was going to need to have her own room soon again, moving into the commons area she would stop and look around.
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Post by Ventia on Jan 27, 2016 20:55:52 GMT -5
Ivy's first reaction was to close up because of his words. Honestly it sounded like he didn't want her around. Like he would be able to live without her. Like he didn't really need her around. And well he didn't. She told herself next. Maybe he wanted her around-but even then, why? When all she would do is hide from him and stick to herself and Jaimie. Why would someone want someone so broken like herself? But even if he did want her around. God knows why. He didn't need her. He lived life without her. So really.
If she looked over the initial response of his words, she could see that he was giving her all the room to go if she wanted. That he wasn't holding her down. That he was showing her, that unlike the last time, he wasn't holding her in a cage. She had the freedom to leave. If she wanted to.
Ivy smiled to herself and cuddled closer, "We'll see. Though I think you're right, i think I should tell them about Fallyn despite anything. Though, I'll go alone. Wouldn't want anything to happen to Jaimie. Who knows what's been happening to rogues these days with the New Dawn. And well I do look different so, I'm sure they wouldn't really believe me if I told them I was Kaitlyn Black." Ivy shrugged and went silent again, just watching the rise and fall of Voss' chest.
"...unless you don't want me here anymore."
Jaimie had woken up maybe ten minutes after Ivy had-tried going back to sleep but then couldn't so decided to go ahead and check up on Auntie Clara. He didn't know where Mom was, after all she wasn't in her room but he knew she wouldn't just leave without telling him. So he and the wolves made their way to the common room and he was knocking on Auntie Clara's room when he spotted Lottie.
He waved, blushed a little because that was just the way he was (no amount of training could quell the shyness he had as a teenager) and stayed where he was. Unsure if he could or should go up to her and hug her good morning. It was different when he was younger. Now that he was almost a full grown teen, he felt slightly awkward.
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Voss
Warrior
Confidence is not 'They will like me'. Confidence is I'll be fine if they don't.
Posts: 1,068
Pack Status: New Dawn, Other
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Post by Voss on Jan 27, 2016 21:25:45 GMT -5
Voss would sigh lightly listening to her as if content with her by his side, he would glance at her if he could before looking to the stars again. " I ...I want you no where else but here, but I wont hold you to stay here. Not like before. " He said softly. The fact being that if he did hold her here like before he knew for a fact she would grow to hate him.
And that was the far from what he wanted, he frowned his eyes a little as he thought for a moment. " I am sure if you tell them straight off you have news of fallyne they will listen to reason. If you are afraid they might seek to harm you leave a message at the border I am sure they patrol like I do here " He said softly, which reminded him he needed to double the watch. He had smelled a unfamiliar smell with in his desert at least once or twice.
Shakeing work from his mind he would let out a soft sigh again before he chuckled. " I can hear all most every thing..." He said randomly as if wanting her to know. " The connection to every one is very strong some times that I have no time of my own in my own head. " He clear his throat a little. " Be honest with me....about your life before. Was there some one you loved?" He didnt know if she loved him, but he knew that some times her body lusted for him. He wanted her to love him though, something he wanted very much. But no much of wanting or magic could make some one love you if it was not already there.
~*~
Lottie would blink seeing Jaimie and wave slowly to him, she smiled seeing him blush a little the shyness made him always have this youthful quality. " Hi " She said softly wondering what he was doing up. She did not know what he was up to or she would of walked over to him, she didn't want to get there and some one open a the door he was knocking at.
She would feel awkward, her sleep t shirt an pj bottoms looked as if they were old and thin. Her father had give her one of his and adjusted its size for her. She liked to be able to smell him when she slept even if he wasn't there, it helped her not be afraid for some reason. She was surprised how close she had gotten to the man she used to be terrified of.
The side of the shoulder was half off her shoulder showing a rose tattoo on her shoulder, she had gone with La La secretly and gotten it. When her father found out he didn't even scold her, no he went to La La and scrambled with her. She wondered how it would look when she got older, she did not know how the woman had talked her into it. She enjoyed the family she was apart of now though she did think of her brother and mother. Often actually. Her hair was up in a pony tail slash bun. It helped to keep it from getting knotted , she bounced lightly watching him.
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Post by Ventia on Jan 27, 2016 22:27:33 GMT -5
Ivy shrugged, "Who knows. You can never really tell with New Dawn. Notes? Eh. That doesn't really work, you want something to be known? Need to go straight to the top. Or someone who talks regularly with the top. Otherwise, your news wouldn't be known for a good week. Or until you tell the top." Ivy shrugged, "I'll find a way. Somehow. Probably contact my brother. Though, he's touring right now."
She spoke while hiding a smile, him telling her that he didn't want her leaving had made her happy. Happy enough that she couldn't wipe the small smile that clung to her lips. Maybe. Maybe this could work. If only she could forget the past. Not that there was much. Mostly her emotions.
She glanced at him at his words and pressed closer. She didn't know about having voices in her mind constantly. Sure. She used the pack link a few times. But it wasn't constant. She wondered if it was like that for him. Then she froze, and glanced back up at him. "I..." She glanced away and closed her eyes before nodding. She laid her head back on his chest and sighed.
"Yeah. There was. He was my first best friend. I held a gun to him in point blank range and ended up almost dying in a cave together on our first meeting. Ever since then? Well. We were inseparable. Until he went away for school. And well lots of other stuff happened and I ended up pushing him away without even seeing him again and leaving. I was afraid to see him. Afraid of what he'd think of me. But...I loved him. A part of me still does. But it's nothing. I haven't seen him in forever. Last I heard of him, he was in a wheelchair. It's in the past. Just like Katie."
Ivy opened her eyes and could feel the tears stinging them. But she forced them down. Because well. That was just a dream. This. Well this was reality. Reaver wasn't the one in front of her, holding and comforting her. It was Voss.
"I can't forget him Voss. But, that doesn't mean that I can't love someone else..."
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Jaimie smiled with relief when she spoke to him and dug his fingers in his sweats. "Hey, morning. I was just trying to see if Auntie Clara was up. But....doesn't look like it. She always makes me come see her in the morning for this kind of examination. If not, she and Mom get kind of angry and worried. So...yeah."
Jaimie moved away from Auntie Clara's door as smoothly as he could with a pack of wolves surrounding his legs and made his way towards Lottie. The wolves all liked her so Jaimie knew that there was nothing to fear. He didn't want Lottie being scared over things.
"What brings you here so early? Couldn't sleep? I'm kind of hungry. Want to go to the pantry?"
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Voss
Warrior
Confidence is not 'They will like me'. Confidence is I'll be fine if they don't.
Posts: 1,068
Pack Status: New Dawn, Other
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Post by Voss on Jan 28, 2016 10:08:20 GMT -5
Voss would chuckle at her explanation of how things worked at New Dawn, he doubted that she knew it all and most likely a lot happened behind the scenes. Though if it were true sounded as if some one house was in disarray, though he was one to talk about it. His own Pack was fresh rules not all laid bare yet, " Well you telling your brother sounds safer to me. The way it sounds you would be walking into a death sentence. " That he did not like the sound of, his brow would furrow with thought and worry. " But that can be saved for another day " He said softly when she pressed closer he smiled, he enjoyed how she felt against him even in rest.
That was short when she froze he would stiffen a little, he held his breath for a few moments till she spoke again and he relaxed. Letting her words sink in for a moment before he smiled, " I am not surprised. I honestly thought it was all me keeping you at bay. " he chuckled and reached up and pinch his nose bridge before rubbing the sleep from his eyes. He rested his hand on his chest a little. " So you think he would not know you if he saw you again?" Something inside of him screamed to take hold land not let go. Pushing that down the only tell was his body heated up more for a moment with a hint of jealousy.
" I am sure he has changed just as much as you. " He paused again for a moment" Are you afraid of him not liking what he sees, or is it that you afraid he has moved on?" He was not completely blind or stupid, he knew she would not choose him first. In fact he was very surprised she had not tried to kill him the next time she had seen him. He was not trying to push her away, he just did not want her to regret any thing. He would shift a little to kiss her forehead his arm tucking her close as he could. " I know you cant forget him...and i know it means you can love some one else. I just....I do not want you to look back and see your life full of what if's" He said softly looking at her.
~*~
Lottie would smile and let out a giggle slightly at his fast explanation, she would tuck some loose hair behind her ear before looking to the door he started to move away from. " I have trouble sleeping a lot." She said softly her fingers on her right hand ran up and down her left arm. " I often find myself raiding the pantry " She said with a laugh, when he said he was hungry and if they should go to the pantry she nodded.
" So how often do you wake up and move about?" She said her pj's sounded like soft cotton, would turn and walk backwards so she could speak to him as she walked. She seemed to not be afraid of bumping into anything," What is the examination for...and why every morning?" She would raise a brow wondering what could possibly be wrong with him. She had let her self be isolated for a while off and on, it was something she did to cope with the nightmares of what happened before.
The assault and the man she had killed, it haunted her in a whole new way. She kept sending videos to her family and yet to receive a response, which brought her down. Wondering if they did not know how to send them, surely they could find a way to remove the block. She shook her head a little remembering not to expect to much of others, her father always said that.
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Post by Ventia on Jan 29, 2016 4:13:12 GMT -5
Ivy shrugged, "Well I do look different. You know, with the dyed hair, contacts, all these tattoos..." Not to mention some angel magic, Ivy thought to herself. "So, yeah. I don't think he'll see me and think about Katie. Maybe if I'm around him for a long period of time he'll figure out that it's me, but if he randomly saw me for a second? I don't think so. This isn't some romantic movie where there will be a change in the air and he'll see me and know that it's me under all this glamour. Life isn't a movie. So no. I don't think so."
Ivy pursed her lips and shook her head. "I'm not afraid of him not liking what he sees. I'm not trying to please anyone. And if he moved on? I'm happy. He lost his mother and...I wasn't there for him...so if he figured out a way to manage and actually be happy then I'll be so happy for him. I want the best for him."
Ivy shook her head again but stilled at the kiss to the forehead and closed her eyes, enjoying his affection. After a few seconds, she started to talk again. "I think you've misunderstood. We never dated. Sure, we pretended to be a couple one day as a game but that was all. I was really the only one who had feelings. I liked him. I don't think he liked me that way. So there's really not any 'what ifs'. It's more of having a crush on someone and not being able to move on."
"If we were going out when i vanished then it's a different story but for him, I was just his silly friend. For me, he was the only thing keeping me together. He gave me no reason to expect something more. Me getting feelings is my own fault." Ivy sighed and glanced at the stars before reaching out for his hand.
Slowly she caressed the warm skin before entwining their fingers together and staring at the effect. After a few moments she stared at Voss and squeezed his fingers harder.
"It doesn't matter. He's in my past. You're my present Voss. You know that. Otherwise I wouldn't even be here. At your pack. I'm...trying. I want to try. Even us. I want to see if what we have...because there's something between us and I want to explore that. I'm tired of living in the past. I'm tired of being alone. I don't want memories and what ifs. I want reality. I want what's in front of me. I want the now."
-
"You have a cute laugh." Jaimie smiled, feeling less awkward now and ran a hand through his messy red hair. "Ugh, it depends. Sometimes I don't wake up at all-Mom needs to haul me out of bed, sometimes I can't sleep for nothing, and sometimes I sleep easily but wake up early like today."
He wasn't as skilled as Lottie so he didn't attempt to walk backwards though the sight of her doing it made him smile. Lottie was always cute and kind to him while he was growing up so he felt comfortable with her. "Oh, it's nothing really. I don't know why they do it but it happens everyday. I mean? I'm perfectly fine." He laughed and bit his lip, though he did know that something was wrong with him. Well. Different. But then again, everyone was different. He was just...more different.
He moved to the kitchen and took out two glasses. "So, what should we make for breakfast?"
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Voss
Warrior
Confidence is not 'They will like me'. Confidence is I'll be fine if they don't.
Posts: 1,068
Pack Status: New Dawn, Other
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Post by Voss on Jan 29, 2016 8:39:02 GMT -5
When she listed off what she had changed he would nod a little," Of course not " He merely stated, when she stated this was not some romantic movie he couldn't help but chuckle. For it sounded as if she was reprimanding him, this only made him smile at the thought. He had never thought himself a romantic type, devilish maybe? Romantic? Never. He would remain silent as she spoke on after his kiss, he was all for listening to her.
One did not need to speak to let some one work things out, she would figure out what to do with New dawn on her own that was for sure. And no matter how much he would tell her one thing she would do another, she was not one for being told what to do. Suggesting something perhaps? But being told what to do was never easy for Katie..Ivy. It sill was going to take some getting used to, something he could do eventually perhaps.
When she began to caress his skin he would let out a weird noise of enjoyment, when her fingers slipped into his he would gently squeeze them. When she squeezed them harder he smiled," I can do that Ivy. Past is just what it is....the past. I know you wont be staying in my room for some time now, but I am willing to go forward instead of gazing back if you are. " He frowned a little before using his hand to pull her on top of him, after that he would bring her hand up and kiss it softly. " But I am going to need you to let your barrier down if you really want to try this, this future between us. " He did not want to have to fight against some one that he loved, just to see inside of them.
His other hand would come up into her hair gently pushing it back from her face," I need you to trust me... or this will never work" He said softly his fingers moving along her neck, he knew he was not the only one having trouble of letting go of the past. Even though it was brief for him he had loved the moments he spent with Katie, even in his fucked up way of doing so.He felt like he had tamed the beast in her some how, that accomplishment even if only in his head had sated the darkness with in him. Or he assumed for how his mood and ideals had changed over time.
~*~
Lottie would smile and red would creep up along her cheeks and down her throat," Um thanks.." She didn't know what to say to it other then that, not she thought thanking was in order either. " Mmm well something must be up if your having such irregular sleeping patterns. Mine is due to trauma i am working to get over. Slowly but surely " She said the last part more soft then the rest. Still backing up till they got to what was considered the mess hall?
It was large area for every one to convene and eat, when he moved into the kitchen she followed him. " Um I usually drink hot chocolate with whip creame on top. " Her figure said other wise, she looked small where it counted and curved all so. More so then her mother had ever been, she would laugh" And some toast with butter and jelly. Nothing extreme. I mean I can cook you some bacon, eggs, suasage, and toast. I mean if that is what you want?"
Staring at him for a moment she would blink, wondering how she always seemed to run into him. She was not put off by it, but it seemed he showed up at the right moments. It was very weird to her, " So I take it they have not ever told you why they make you do this every morning?" She would start to reach up for the hot chocolate on the high shelf. Her night shirt coming up a bit before she tugged the box down. " Gotcha" She whispered. She would look to Jaimie a smile creeping up on her lips," Parents all so secretive, I guess aunts are too, yeah?" She wait to hear what he wanted for breakfast.
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Post by Ventia on Jan 29, 2016 11:40:15 GMT -5
Ivy blushed a little when he easily picked her up and because of that, she was straddling his hips. A memory of a long time ago popped into head and she found herself blushing a tad bit harder. Even so, she closed her eyes to his caress and shivered a little at the kiss.
It felt natural to be sitting on top of him. To feel his body underneath hers and not feel a rush of discomfort. She liked it, Ivy stretched out on top of him and ran just the tip of her fingers against the side of his head, ruffling his hair a little.
"I'm willing. Trust me, I am." She whispered, feeling his heat envelop her completely now. She half smiled at his mention of her barrier and shrugged slightly. "I'll try, it's not easy for me. After all, I don't want to get hurt. But...I'll try." She breathed out shakily a little with his other hand against her neck, enjoyed the sensation of swallowing and feeling his hand right there at her pulse.
She glanced at him and found herself staring into those red-orange eyes of his and she could only smile. "I do trust you Voss. Maybe not as much as you'd like, but I know you'll try to do anything to protect me and I feel safe because of that. So yes, I trust you." Ivy ran her finger down his cheek, along his jaw, until she rubbed just below his chin.
"You're warm." She mumbled more to herself, enjoying the sensations. "You were always so warm. I love it." Ivy glanced at his lips and leaned forward, "I'm going to kiss you." She whispered just before her lips met his.
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Jaimie shrugged, "I guess. But I'll be fine. After all, Mom's a doctor and you guys have a pretty good doctor as well so if anything is wrong, I'll be fine. Always got to stay positive right?" Jaimie smiled warmly, his boyish features coming to light along with the smile.
"Mm, that all sounds wonderful. I wouldn't mind that at all-if you want to cook it, that is. Mom hates cooking-especially with oil so that's why you don't have to do anything you don't want." He was rambling a little-he was like that with most girls. He still didn't quite know how to talk to them. Even if he was somewhat around Lottie while going into maturity.
Jaimie laughed but not wholeheartedly. He knew why he needed the morning checkups. They told him since he was a kid. He just...didn't want Lottie-or anyone for that matter-knowing that he was different. "It's fine though. I don't mind. It makes them be at ease so it's ok." He smiled, "I think aunts are even more secretive then mothers. Especially Auntie Clara."
"So...you cook the food and I'll make the hot cocoa? I can also help cooking if you want-and, you'll be fine Lottie. You're strong. Sorry, that was random." He blushed a little, rubbing the back of his neck.
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Voss
Warrior
Confidence is not 'They will like me'. Confidence is I'll be fine if they don't.
Posts: 1,068
Pack Status: New Dawn, Other
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Post by Voss on Jan 29, 2016 12:55:08 GMT -5
Voss watched her for a long moment his fingers gentle against her neck, though the texture was rough. " I know..and I trust you in any choices you make personally. " He was referring to her deciding to go or not to new dawn, when she breathed shakily it made his pulse jump the instinct to chase and mark once more pulse through him. He had marked her before, but she had been trying to erase him from her.
He thought eventually he would have to mark her again, but he would not push it. When her green eyes went to his his locked onto hers staring as a smile rose on his lips. He had remembered them being Clear blue, that shocking anger in them which only furthered to flame his loins. He would take a deep breath to calm himself.
Her fingers along his jaw line was not helping him keep calm, she mumbled him being warm and the sound of her voice made him ache. " Ok " was all he said to announcing she was going to kiss him. It was like tipping the scale when her lips met his, his loins felt on fire needing to be quenched. His lips met hers hard at first but softened in small little pecks, he closed his eyes wrapping his arms around her.
They felt of restraint from holding her to tightly and pulling her closer to him, his need was under the surface where it held it stead fast. He wanted to do many things, but not in the open for every one to see. Him being a private man had not changed, and most likely never would.
His fingers trailed along her neck his other hand coming up, one searching for the mark. When found he slowly run his finger across it as he let out a growl through the kiss, he wanted to move her into his room and put Lottie in with Jaimie. He did not think about the age of him now, or Lottie.
~*~
Lottie smiled her head bobbing in a nod when he said gotta stay positive, " Yeah it helps to keep you out of dark thoughts in your mind " She said softly handing him the box of cocoa, when he spoke about it all sounding wonderful. Well she wasted no time headed for the fridge and pulling out what was needed, she bent down grabbing the sausage that La La had bought. She said it had been seasoned, along with the bacon which was maple. She heard her stomach growl and ignored it, though she did hear him talking on about only if she wanted to as if it was wrong to ask. " I do not mind at all. I am going to be eating too, it is not like I am just cooking for you silly, and yeah go ahead and make the cocoa"
She giggled watching him for a bit she could tell he was being stand offish about something. Though she could not put her finger on it, she pushed aside her need to pry into his life and began to make patties for the sausage. She loved the inside grill stove, placing the patties on it she would move quickly to place the bacon on as well shifting to wash her hands quickly.
Turning to the pantry she would draw out some flour, backing soda, salt, sugar she would lean to the fridge grabbing cold unsalted butter and milk. Grab down a bowl and start to mix in the ingredients needed to make biscuits, " So Mister Mysterious whats with the blushes?" She giggled she enjoyed teasing him, if she could not figure out the rest of him. Her fingers covered in doughy mess she would sigh" Could you powder the counter with some flour I forgot to" she had mixed up the mess in the bowl with her hands after washing them.
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Post by Ventia on Jan 29, 2016 13:55:25 GMT -5
"Ok," Ivy whispered, her breath hot on his lips, smiling at his immediate acceptance for her desire to kiss him before doing so. Her back curved, her body naturally pressing into him and she sighed against his lips-feeling perfectly content especially when he wrapped her in his arms.
Her own arms stretched out and she cupped his cheeks, bringing him closer all while her toes curled with enjoyment. He was so warm and he tasted...Ivy liked it, she wanted more. She pulled back a little, just enough to pull in a deep breath and then run her tongue along the curve of his bottom lip, all whist caressing his cheek.
She missed this. Human contact. Affection. Desire. She wanted it. Needed to feel loved. To take part in it as well. So she kissed his chin, running her lips down his warm skin to his neck, trembling at the touch of his finger against his mark. She remember how she tried cutting it off. How one time, she was too impatient and she cut off a big chunk of her skin...but when it grew back? His mark was still there. And now? Now she was sort of relieved that it was.
Because him caressing it? God. It felt amazing.
Ivy kissed his jumping pulse, teased it with her teeth and wondered how it would feel to break the skin and mark him. Her wolf piked up at that, it's gaze interested at the suggestion. But then again? Her wolf loved blood and biting into flesh. Ivy pushed the wolf down and kissed the pulsing flesh before running her lips back up to his face, taking a detour to nibble on his earlobe before kissing him harder.
She wanted to lose herself within Voss. Like she did in the past.
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"Ok ok, just making sure, thank you. In advance. For the food." Jaimie knew he was being silly, but he didn't have that much experience in talking to anyone other than his family and guys. Yeah, he's been here for a little bit now but it didn't change the fact that he still wasn't used to it.
He chucked at the nickname and rubbed the back of his neck, "Ah. You know? The awkward teen. That's me. And I'm not mysterious. I'm more of a open book if you ask me. You're the mysterious one, Lottie. Well, lots of people here are mysterious."
He took the cocoa and put it to the side, "Sure, let me just wash my hands real quick." He moved to the sink and after a quick wash and a hand drying session, he opened the flour and sprinkled enough on the counter before wiping his hands on his sweats. Jaimie didn't care about getting messy. Plus, it was only flour.
"Anything else I can help you with?" He asked, while pouring the milk in their cups so he could heat it up. He didn't do it fancy like Mom, more like he microwaved the milk and then put in the powder and the whip creame on top. It tasted the same to him.
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