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Post by Ventia on Jul 27, 2022 7:08:16 GMT -5
(( Thea )) Ruby knew she wasn't in a good mood when she finally made it back to her and Sybil's little apartment, tucked in one of the safest zones of the neutral town. It didn't have anything to do with the multiple battle wounds she had gotten only a few hours ago from her latest errand, although it had been a bit tricky riding back home on her motorcycle. It wasn't even the fact that she missed dinner with Sybil, which Ruby told her that might happen and to not wait up for her-though to be completely honest she was a little annoyed that she missed Sybil's home cooking-her bad mood ultimately had everything to do with what she had to witness at that place. She both hated and loved her job. To any outsiders it would seem as though the youngest Constantine sibling had no job for she seemed to always have time on her hands and could mostly be found in her home, or taking Sybil wherever she needed to go. No, it seemed as though Ruby Constantine was achieving nothing in her life. And yet, when it came to money Ruby paid for it all. Despite Sybil's wishes of wanting to pay for herself or even paying half for all the bills for their apartment-Ruby denied her each time. Even when the clever minx tried to slip her paychecks in some of Ruby's clothing or wallet, the few hundred dollar bills would always find their way right back to Sybil's purse. She always told Sybil to save her money, that it was hers to do with what she wanted, that Ruby had enough of her own to be set for her very long shifter life. Of course Sybil won a few times with paying for dates although those exceptions were always because Ruby was distracted and Sybil would get to the bill faster, only for Ruby to complain later and try to spend double the amount on her-it was their little game they played. And when Sybil bought Ruby things, she of course kept her lips closed and was more than happy to receive what Sybil got for her. She always returned the favor. She loved spoiling Sybil, to the point where it became unhealthy, if Ruby could have convinced Sybil to stop working her part-time jobs and only live as a roommate for her entire life, Ruby would have. But Sybil nipped that the moment she tried to say it. Ruby of course respected her wishes. To get to the point, money had never been a issue since Ruby was seventeen. For both she and her brother Killian. Overnight, they both became rich and murderers. Covered in blood, much like she was today, with countless bodies in their wake, and double that of prostitutes. At first, they had only wanted to help those people, get them back on their feet, give them a new life, after the first few years, it was clear to both siblings that it could never be so easy to let go of their pasts. Without even knowing, they built a underground empire that was solely based on ridding the world of filth and simultaneously offering a helping hand to those in need. With members in the hundredths and that number only rising with each successful mission, they became the great company they are today. Of course, they were a silent company where their information and news never made it to the surface but they were there, and those that needed their assistance always found it one way or another. Ruby sighed, wishing she could wash away the memories as easily as she could this blood. Every time she had to do a errand like this, the sights she witnessed that night, would always come and haunt her and worst of all, replay her own hideous memories. Even now, she could see a ghost of herself, long haired and dressed in the most scandalous and revealing outfit, with men hovering around her, roaming hands and leering eyes- Ruby felt her stomach heave, she turned the key off, kicking down the stand and finally lifted herself off the bike. Body feeling heavy, she eased through the dark parking lot her steps slow and unsteady, at least she wasn't dripping blood anymore. Ruby glanced back to double check and was happy there was none, she didn't have it in her to come back out with a wet rag and rub down her bloody trail marks like she had to a few other nights or early mornings. Finally at her apartment door, she fumbled for the keys and after a moment or two found the right one and let it go in, unlocking it and letting herself in. Her eyesight had been dizzy beforehand but sometime during the ride back it had improved, only when she moved too fast did the wooziness claim her. Not that she wanted to move all too fast anyway. Her eyes glanced across the open space, she could see down into the kitchen with the room layout and was happy to not see Sybil half asleep either on the dining room table or couch that sat in front of the t.v. Good. Ruby had complained enough times that Sybil didn't need to wait up on her on such uncomfortable places that it seemed like Sybil finally listened to her. Not that she didn't get a little bit happy seeing Sybil looking adorable as she slept. She could peek in on her later, first though, a shower seemed nice. Sybil had just redecorated a little bit and Ruby didn't want to get blood all over the new furniture. So she relocked the door and hobbled her way over to their shared bathroom, she tried not to make so much noise knowing how light a sleeper Sybil was, and hoped the water running and her moving about wouldn't wake her mate.
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Post by Thea on Jul 27, 2022 20:43:47 GMT -5
Their relationship had started out slowly. Which was fine with Sybil. Being turned into something not human by your ex-boyfriend can really flip your world on its head. And being kicked out of the only home you’ve ever known, shunned by the religion you’ve held fast to? It was like whiplash. As she dealt with it Ruby was right there. Right from the very beginning. She never expected anything from her. Never demanded repayment for not even a soda from the gas station. Sure, she was attracted to Ruby, even though at first, she was afraid to admit it. But after she spent weeks being okay with herself and her newfound abilities, that attraction grew into appreciation, then fondness, then love.
And yes, she did love Ruby. Sybil hadn’t said it yet and not just because she was afraid of what Ruby would say. She wanted the perfect moment to say it. Just hadn’t found it yet.
Sybil did end up going to bed after her dinner was over. Did she sleep? No. She wasn’t sure what the difference was between falling asleep on the couch or dining table and trying to sleep in their shared bed but if she had to guess it had something to do with Ruby. Since the first time they slept in the same bed, it was as if her body knew subconsciously that Ruby was supposed to be spooning her right now and she wasn’t. She’s tried counting sheep, math problems, and laying on Ruby’s side of the bed. The most success she’s had is nodding off before she heard the front door open.
She didn’t get out of bed at first, only turned her head toward the bedroom door as she sat up and waited for Ruby to come in. Her heartbeat kicked up with anticipation and she couldn’t help the smile that split her face from ear to ear. Any other girlfriend would storm out and demand where their significant other had been. Sybil never was the type to do that, though. Ruby has proven that she never had to worry about whether she was going out to cheat or anything deceitful like that. However, Ruby has never told her what she did during those excursions. Did she want to know? Of course. But Sybil was never one to pry. And never did she want Ruby to be angry with her for anything. Instead, figuring that Ruby would tell her in her own time, she let her girlfriend carry her to bed, content in knowing that she was there whenever Ruby needed her.
The smell of blood drifted under the door slowly – at first, Sybil wasn’t sure where it was coming from or why it was smelling so metallically suddenly. She straightened a few moments later when the sound of the shower started the next wall over. In her mind’s eye, she saw her animal counterpart standing at attention, rigid with worry. It had Sybil, dressed for bed in a sports bra and a pair of maroon cotton shorts with her hair up in a messy knot, speeding to the bathroom on light feet.
And there her girlfriend was, looking ten times worse than the first night Sybil came to stay. The metallic tang of blood was ever-present, now, a scent that she wouldn’t soon forget. “Ruby?” she uttered, her voice thick with fright at what she was seeing. “Oh, my god what happened? Are you okay?” As soon as she asked, she winced, knowing that Ruby, in fact, was not okay. She was pale white underneath all that blood, the same shade Sybil was on a normal day. The deer-shifter’s stomach lurched, and her head went fuzzy with the threat of fainting.
Still yet, she forced herself to step into the bathroom, her eyes traveling Ruby’s body before locking gazes. “What can I do?”
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Post by Ventia on Jul 28, 2022 5:46:41 GMT -5
Ruby began undressing the moment she closed the bathroom door behind her, first emptying her pockets on the sink countertop, keys her phone one of her switchblades that she always kept on her and a roll of bills that was only stained a little bit with dried blood and dirt. She kicked off her shoes next and pulled down the sticky and wet leggings and panties she wore, wincing under her breath when one particular area of the leggings seemed to be stuck to her skin. When she forced it off, a flash of pain came and wetness fell down her knee.
"Shit." Ruby groaned, watching as one wound reopened and hurried to pull off her bra and shirt. She didn't waste no time to step into the shower and reached for the hot water, glancing down at the tile floor and cursing the few drops of blood she had spilled on the fluffy light green mat Sybil had recently bought. She would have bent down and fixed it that very second but worried she'd only get more blood on it, she would rub the stains out the moment she was done showering.
Adding only a fraction of cold water to the mix, Ruby sighed as she stepped under the running water, the heat tickled her skin and soothed out the tension she had been carrying ever since she stepped into that abandon motel. Her thoughts began to wander, reliving the last twelve hours, beginning with the phone call alerting her of the change of plans and how crucial it was for them to strike tonight, to having to leave Sybil with another roundabout excuse, to driving over to one of the safe houses and gearing up, having to deal with half the team missing and yet still refusing to call over Killian-she knew he still took the occasional gig but Ruby also knew that he tried to lessen the amount of times he was on the field.
She didn't blame her brother for not wanting to go as much and was all too happy to keep him out of it, technically neither of them should have to make appearances, they were only needed in big operations but Ruby had made a point in keeping around, made a point for them to call her first and not Killian; she told herself it was for the company, for those she saved, yet she knew she was full of it. That the real reason always came out in the end.
When the worst of it was done and over with, when they were moving the people out, when she had to interacted with those chained up, mistreated and drugged, malnourished with empty eyes. They barely noticed her, barely registered that they were free. Instead they would just follow her people out as if they were their next masters. A few were conscious and grateful, few quietly crying tears of joy, few who begged to call their families and want to go home. Each and every scene slowly began digging deep into Ruby's soul, too many memories kept coming and going, and yet Ruby could still handle it, but then there were those that blamed her for ruining their lives.
The ones that didn't want to be saved, the broken seemingly beyond repair, they pleaded for another fix, they flirted wanting to be fucked, wanting for violence and their gifts-drugs alcohol all of it-screamed and cried over their dead master bodies, struggled against her team not wanting to leave, it went on and on, until Ruby felt sick to her stomach, everything had finally caught up to her, both past and present molding and splintering within her mind, her final broken pieces fell apart and she lost herself to her memories, to the rage and violence, to the fear and disgust, the pain she received, the pain she delivered...
She would always find herself coming to, alone surrounded by bodies, the few that they planned to take prisoner and turn over to the law, now laid in a wet mess of bones and teared flesh. Blood covered the walls and floor, her body drenched in it, wounds she could have avoided-that she did avoid earlier-now covering her body some of them inflicted by her own hands. She would walk through the building in a haze, finding no survivors, feeling guilt and disgust growing with each step, until she finally made it back outside.
Where her own people could barely meet her gaze, the scent of fear sticking to their bodies, from then on she would give a few commands and watch as they all hurried off. Some days she would burn the buildings, others she would leave them as they were, wanting those in the same business to witness the massacre that was her and know they would soon be next.
She was dazed as the water pounded down on her, a seemingly endless stream of blood filling the drain, she stared down feeling like she was miles away as blood and water mixed between her toes, the color staining her in ways that water could never wash away. She was a killer. She was mad. She was broken. Ruby had accepted this of herself. It was the only way she knew how to cope. How to live. She had to take these trips, had to soothe the scars of her past by scorching the earth and ridding the world of filth.
It was worth it, worth the disgust she felt for herself, to know with each break of her mind, the world was a better place. She only wish that Sybil would never had to witness this part of her. That she would never know how broken Ruby really was. How disgusting she was. How much of a killer she was. How much blood stained her hands. It was why she waited longer to come home, even as her body wanted to shut down, she pushed it, needing to make sure her sins would never breech Sybil's bubble of peace.
It was only recently that Sybil was starting to feel normal, to relax by her side, even accept her as a girlfriend, Ruby would die before she messed that up, before she scared her with the truth, Ruby couldn't be a broken mess, she had to be strong and reliable, she had to be the sane one, she had to-
Sybil's sweet voice cut into her thoughts like a electric current, jarring her awake Ruby turned her face to look through the transparent shower curtain. Fear instantly kicked into gear, the need to scrub down her arms and legs, to rid the amount of blood off of her before Sybil could see-until she settled down, her own concern for Sybil's fear overriding her own emotions.
"I'm okay, it looks worst than it is." Ruby was quick to reassure her. "Please don't come any closer, it's dirty in here..." she was dirty, but Ruby's eyes glanced down to her bloodied clothes just inches away from Sybil's clean toes. She gave her mate a smile that only reached her eyes a fraction.
Seeing Sybil, no matter any situation, always brought peace over to Ruby, even now as her memories still collided with themselves and the shitty way she was feeling, Sybil's peaceful energy began driving it all away, her body began to relax, the tension easing away like a bad dream, the negative thoughts drifting back into its cage, deep deep down into her soul where it would only resurface when she lost it all once more.
"I'm sorry," she said, her voice coming back to it's normal tone, and she turned around facing Sybil, and began rinsing out her hair. "To have frighten you, but really I'm okay. I'll be done soon, can you make some tea? And get the medic bag, there's probably only two wounds that need attention-seriously Sybil I'm okay, please don't make that face to me, it makes me want to hug you but I cant right now since I'll only get you dirty."
This time when she smiled it did reach her eyes and she found herself smiling again, "Maybe some food too? I'm a bit hungry now that I'm home."
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Post by Thea on Jul 28, 2022 17:08:03 GMT -5
Sybil was already by the sink by the time Ruby spoke, telling her not to get closer. Obediently, she stopped, using the edge of the basin as a crutch. If it hadn't been there, she was sure that her jelly-like legs wouldn't have held her up any longer. Her eyes hadn't left Ruby's person since she opened the bathroom door, but when Ruby's gaze cast downward she followed it until they came across the bloody clothes not even a foot away from her.
"Looks worse than it was" her ass, she thought, her stomach lurching once more with the threat of dislodging her dinner. She really wasn't all that phased by blood, but there was just ... so much of it. The smell was still prevalent, not going anywhere anytime soon. And she didn't miss the panic in her girlfriend's voice either, which really drove home the fact that Ruby wasn't all right. Sybil didn't know what Ruby was thinking, about how she was feeling about herself. That the panic wasn't just because of the blood and that Sybil tried to come closer.
Sybil had half a mind to walk closer anyway. Help her in any way that she could and not leave Ruby alone. But she wasn't sure what she could do other than what Ruby asked her to do. She seemed to act like this was a normal everyday occurrence. Or at the very least knew what she was doing. And, well, Ruby had been born a shifter. Said that the healing process was accelerated for people like them. Maybe she really would be okay after a few hours.
Tears came to Sybil’s eyes unbidden, hearing Ruby apologize for her tone and begging for her not to give her “that face”. Even though she wasn’t sure what “that face” meant. Shock? Sickly? Fear? She was sure her face was tinged green – she had never been so close to so much blood. It was on the wad of bills she had, the switchblade. The floor. Her mint green bathmat that she liked so much. Sybil bent down at her waist, keeping her hold on the sink as she wiped her eyes quickly then picked up Ruby’s clothes one by one. If Ruby protested, she would only shake her head. “I need to put these in the washer.”
Her parents had made her do all the chores in the house, even at age 19 when she was going to work and college. Even before her brother was kicked out for his “sinful ways”. Being the girl, she had always been held to a different standard than him. He didn’t have much freedom either, mind, but he had more than her. He could laze about in the home and go out with her father during his secret church meetings. Meanwhile, Sybil was being groomed to be the perfect wife. The perfect woman. Seen, not heard, demure, and able to follow without question. Ruby has said to her before that she didn’t want Sybil to do any cleaning in the house with the mentality that it was her duty. That she had chores to do. Usually, she didn’t. This time, she was trying to find a thread of familiarity in a foreign situation. Nothing more.
“I’ll be right back! Don’t move, please.”
She held the clothes out at arm’s length, somehow keeping Ruby’s clothes in one hand so that she can keep her other hand free to do the necessary steps to start the washer. Was she even supposed to wash them, she wasn’t sure. But she had to feel helpful. Her hand was now stained red with her blood, presumably her girlfriend’s blood, though she knew that if she looked at it before she could get to the kitchen sink she would probably faint.
Once she scrubbed her hand clean, she dried her hands with so much force she was surprised they weren’t raw. She took a few moments then, her mind buzzing and smoking in its attempt to process Ruby’s predicament, hands pressed to her forehead as if to keep her thoughts in place. Then she set to work with what Ruby asked. Leftovers from dinner were transferred to a bowl to be nuked in the microwave. The Keurig poured hot water into a mug with a tea bag in it. She fetched the medic bag that was in the hallway closet and placed it over her shoulder, gripping the strap with the strength of ten men in worry.
Was Ruby really going to be okay? What happened? Did she get jumped? It wasn’t common in these parts, but with how late Ruby was usually out it wouldn’t have surprised Sybil. Anger burned hot in her chest at the thought, tears brimming her eyes again. Exasperated, she swiped at them, huffing out an irritated sigh at herself.
Ruby didn’t need Sybil to break down right now.
When the tea was done steeping, she hopped on the counter to retrieve the honey that was on the middle shelf of the cabinet, hating for the millionth time that she was so short. She really needed to get a step stool, she thought. The first normal thought that she had within the last however so many minutes since Ruby’s been home. And like it was a stepping stone, she continued to think objectively. Mundane things and tasks that needed to be done. Taking one step at a time.
When Sybil arrived back in the bathroom, she was noticeably calmer, though a bit hesitant. “I’ve got food in the microwave and your tea on the counter.” She set the medic bag on the counter and opened it slowly, taking in what all was inside it. She was familiar with a first aid kit. Antibiotic ointment, band aids, burn cream. But this bag was almost like if Mary Poppins was a doctor. “Tell me what I need to do.”
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Post by Ventia on Jul 28, 2022 20:37:13 GMT -5
"Syb you don't have to-" but she was already gone with her bloodied clothes, and the guilt that was digging deep into Ruby only increased. She stared out the open bathroom door and then back to the floor, where her clothes had stained the floor. She hadn't wanted to show Sybil this, had been successful up to now to hide these moments from her, and now she had messed up all over again.
Ruby sighed, her self hatred kicking her in the ass, and began cleaning herself. She had to wash her hair three times to rid the lasts of the blood away, and that was saying something since she only had a few inches of hair herself. Washing her body next she was able to see where she was hurt, a long gash on her shoulder and one just below her thigh were the only worrisome ones, the few she had gotten from the attackers were only a few cuts and bruises, the worst of them already scabbing over.
She was always her worst enemy, Ruby thought as she hugged herself her fingers laying perfectly on the shoulder gash. Her mind went blank, focusing on getting clean, once she was she found herself feeling weary and eased down to sit under the running water, bringing her knees up and leaning her head on them while looking out the doorway.
When Sybil came back, Ruby stared at her with unblinking focus, watching her every move, to the brave face she was wearing down to her still trembling fingers. The water felt good raining down on her while she had been alone, but now it was only getting in her way to be with Sybil. She reached back and turned the shower off, before squeezing her hair to get out the majority of the water.
"Thank you Sybil," She eased up on tired legs and reached for one of the towels, drying herself off still in the shower before wrapping it around her body. She stepped out and immediately sat down on the closed toilet, bending over to grab the bath rug. She could see the hydrogen peroxide from the bag and took it, "Just this and a wrap, I guess the antibiotic cream as well but we don't really need to. By tomorrow I'll be good as new."
She poured some peroxide on the rug where the spots of blood was and using her towel began patting it clean, when most of it was off she moved it to the side to put into the washer and turned to face Sybil once more. "Pass me a gauze?" She asked and Sybil after a second of searching passed it to her.
They spent the next few moments in silence as Ruby poured some more hydrogen peroxide on the gauze and began patting down her thigh, the wound bubbled and stung but Ruby barely registered it, her mind too worried on what Sybil was thinking. She was trying to make this as normal as possible, when inn reality she wanted to be left alone, or more specifically didn't want Sybil to get used to this sight of herself. But the damage was done already and all Ruby could do was try to take it one second at a time.
Once cleaning the thigh gash, Sybil poured a generous amount of the antibiotic ointment, Ruby said thank you and grabbed one wrap, she took the wrapper off and began wrapping her thigh. Then she proceeded to clean and put cream on her shoulder and lifted up her arm for Sybil to bandage it.
They were still silent as Sybil finished up and Ruby watched as her mate dutifully began placing everything back and throwing away the wrappers in the trash. Ruby felt the guilt right at the surface watching Sybil and when she couldn't take anymore of it, she reached out and caught her still trembling hand.
"Hey," she said softly brushing her thumb against Sybil's soft fingers, the tingling sensation of the mate tinges running up her arm in a comforting way, reassuring her that their bond was still intact. Ruby often feared that one day Sybil would reject her and those tingles would dispersed.
"Are you okay? Was this too much?" She knew Sybil didn't do too good with blood and hoped she didn't make Sybil feel fear for her like she ended up making all her previous flings feel-although before she hadn't cared whether or not if they did or didn't, but with Sybil...Ruby always cared.
If Ruby was smart, she would have gone back to the safe house and shower there, redress in clean clothes and come back patched and good as new. The only problem was, after a episode of her going berserk, she couldn't bare to be around anyone, and her crew though they never stated it aloud was always grateful she didn't linger around too long afterwards, their disgust and fear clear enough to drive her away.
If she was smart, she could have bought another apartment, just to use cleaning up, but Ruby knew she would be driving home to Sybil in any circumstance she found herself in. The need to come home, to come back to Sybil as fast as possible, would always drive her this way.
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Post by Thea on Jul 29, 2022 1:20:11 GMT -5
Sybil hadn’t realized how shaky she was, not until Ruby had taken her hand. Those tingles, still mysterious in its origins, traveled up her arm as if they were an extension of her girlfriend, sending little waves of reassurance that she was alive and well. That she was sitting in front of her, looking concerned as if she hadn’t come home broken and bloody.
At first, Sybil couldn’t speak, nodding at Ruby’s first question and then shaking her head no at the second. She really wasn’t sure what she meant by “was this too much”, though. Too much blood? Yeah. If she didn’t have to see any more in this lifetime, she would be just fine with that. But she had a feeling that if she voiced her current thinking process Ruby would take that as an incentive to not come home until her wounds were licked clean from then on.
Even if it had to mean Sybil had to play nurse, she would rather Ruby come home like this. That way she wouldn’t be alone when she didn’t need to be. And so that Sybil knew that Ruby was alive.
Just thinking of her somewhere in an alleyway, crumpled and bleeding out – dying alone … while Sybil was here, waiting on her to come home … the image played on repeat, a broken record that needed to just stop playing all together. The tears arrived again, despite her conviction to stay dry-eyed. “I’m fine,” she murmured in a wobbly tone. “It’s not me getting bandaged up.” With their hands still joined, she brought them closer to herself and pressed a shaky kiss to Ruby’s thumb. Two single tears fell shortly after that, and she took great lengths to wipe them away from their fingers. “I’m worried about you.”
The question was on the tip of her tongue, begging to be released from the tight leash Sybil had on it. What happened? She wanted to know. Needed. Felt like in some sick twisted way she deserved to know. But did she? Sybil had a hard time with things like that. The feeling of deserving, of worthiness. No matter how many times Ruby has shown time and again that she had a right to feeling that way, the voice in the back of her head, sounding very much like her parents, hadn’t given her any peace about that subject.
It was just best if Ruby came to her, and she should feel fine with knowing that she was there for her. “I-I’m going to get you some clean clothes. And-d then we can g-go to the kitchen.” It hadn’t been the first time that she’s seen Ruby naked. Having moved in, it was bound to happen. As their relationship bloomed, naturally she saw it more often. Showers. Sex. And sometimes Ruby just liked to sleep naked. Even though sometimes Sybil still felt shy around it. This time, when she offered to get clothes, it wasn’t because she was being shy. It was because she figured that Ruby had gotten cold and would want clothes on that weren’t covered with blood.
It took longer than she intended to come back, though not by much. When she did, armed with a loose tee and a pair of boxers, she was less shaky, eyes bloodshot from crying. “Here,” she whispered, stepping between Ruby’s legs so that she could put the shirt on Ruby. Was Ruby capable of doing it herself? Yes. But Sybil wanted to dress her, trying to be helpful in every possible way. Ruby didn’t seem to care all that much, because she didn’t complain. Her arms went through the sleeves just fine, and she brought the boxers up the rest of the way, careful not to let the hem grazed her bandaged thigh.
Mildly satisfied, she stepped away and held out her hand, steadier than before. With the baggy clothes on, Ruby just looked like she had gotten out of the shower. Her jaw relaxed, then, lips slightly parted as she took in the sight before her. Even if she wanted to, she couldn’t bring herself to ask what had happened. She did intend to ask the question again of whether Ruby really was going to be okay, now that she had cleaned up. But what came out of her mouth was unanticipated. And quite shocking, even to her own ears.
“I love you.”
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Post by Ventia on Aug 2, 2022 23:47:00 GMT -5
Ruby was about to get up and take Sybil's outstretched hand, she had so much she wanted to say and yet it felt like the words got clogged up in her throat as Sybil's sweetness rolled over her. The way Sybil took care of her so gently with her heart wide open was something Ruby had never experienced before. Sybil had always been honest to herself, every emotion showing innocently in her eyes, in everything she did and said, she never hid the truth from Ruby-the complete opposite of herself.
A feeling of unworthiness flew through her as it had periodically throughout their entire relationship, Sybil was too good for someone like Ruby, that thought had always came and gone in her mind, even worse so on nights like these. And yet, as Ruby began to brush her fingers into Sybil's outstretched ones, their hands naturally entwining Sybil's words finally met her ears.
Ruby blinked, she knew what she just heard and yet that part of her told her she had heard wrong. But it was the shocked yet warm look in Sybil's lovely eyes that reassured her and as always, smothered and soothed that wounded piece of her soul, cradling it with gentle fingers as if she would always love every part of her no matter how stained with darkness it was.
Without even knowing tears grew in Ruby's eyes, that tingling burning sensation as her eyes felt wet and blurry was one she hadn't felt in years. "I love you." Ruby whispered softly, her fingers tightening over Sybil's. "I love you so much Sybil." She smiled and rushed to wipe the few tears coming down her face and at her eyes.
Tugging gently on Sybil's arm, she pulled her closer until Ruby would press her face into Sybil's belly, her free hand wrapping around her middle in a half hug. After a tight squeeze to her fingers, Ruby let them go and wrapped her other hand tightly around her back, hugging her close and pressing the side of her face into her warm body.
Sybil's scent, light and tranquil, rolled over her shielding her from the world-from even her past-if Sybil could love her after such a hard life of her own, if she could feel that way for someone like her, then maybe it was time Ruby could love herself as well. Forgive herself.
It was such a ironic thought seeing as how she had just killed dozens of men and women, and would likely still keep on killing, but she had a feeling she would have less blackouts from then on.
"There's always been a part of me that felt like I wasn't worthy of you Sybil, I mean look at tonight, I came home covered in blood again and I haven't even been honest with you about why. I act like it's normal and you accept it because you're just too good of a person...when you shouldn't. You really shouldn't... Is it really alright to love someone like me? Will that really make you happy?" Her voice was raw and filled with emotions that she always kept tightly reined.
"Is it okay for me to love you? For us to stay together forever?"
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Post by Thea on Aug 3, 2022 16:47:32 GMT -5
The tingles became more prevalent the tighter their fingers interlocked, her skin almost humming in content. Sybil had felt a mix of emotions when her mouth betrayed her with those three little words. Truth sang through her body, followed by the quiet love she had for Ruby. Her stomach had clenched in worry, though. Worry that after all this time, after all she's been through finding herself and learning to open her heart to someone she never thought she'd be with, Ruby didn't feel the same. She feared that she would shatter if Ruby didn't say them back.
When she did?
Oh.
She felt so light. So feather-like that a simple breeze could pick her up and carry her off. She made no protest as Ruby pulled her in, squeezing their fingers in assurance for both her and her girlfriend. Her free hand found its way to Ruby's back, moving in slow, wide circles, careful of the wound that was there underneath her clean shirt. When Ruby released her fingers, that hand hugged Ruby's head to her body tentatively. Like if she were to press too hard this moment would end.
Ruby's words brought her back down from her float, and she cast her gaze down to the top of her head to study the short hairstyle she always sported. Sybil, ever the listener, gave Ruby her undivided attention, those tears threatening to come back full force with the lump in her throat as their backup. Ruby didn't feel worthy? Did Sybil make her feel that way? She remembered the first few weeks, where Sybil steered clear of her then-roommate. She had been so afraid of her - not in the way she was afraid of men, but what Ruby stood for and her attraction to her.
God, if she could turn back time with the mentality she had now ...
Sybil cleared her throat a few times, silently shaking her head to deny her being too good despite Ruby not seeing it. The woman didn't see her as "good", not when she felt like she was the one to make Ruby feel so unworthy. Despite her earlier reservations, she tightened her own hold of their embrace, not wanting to let go for the rest of her life. "I know that you'll tell me in your own time," Sybil said, shaky voice barely above a whisper. "I want to ask and I feel so selfish for wanting to know but you didn't push me when I was going through my own stuff. I just want you to know that I'm here when you're ready."
It was then that her tears started their descent down her face, causing her to pause so that she could wipe her face on her shoulders. She gave up after a few minutes; it was clear to her that this time she wouldn't be able to stop the waterworks. "I knew for a good while now that I love you. That you make me happy just by being by me." Ruby always came across as strong, a pillar that couldn't be knocked down by the strongest of earthquakes. Sybil remembered the night she woke Ruby up from one of her nightmares, and the nonchalant way she answered her when she asked if she was all right. Like she had just scraped a knee and it'll be fine in a few minutes. Ruby's vulnerability right now both broke Sybil's heart into a million pieces and had her feeling reverent. "It's more than okay for you to love me. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, baby." The last syllable broke out on a sob.
"Just ... just promise me that you'll come home to me, okay?"
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Post by Ventia on Aug 14, 2022 15:41:32 GMT -5
"Always. I'll always come home to you. You are my home now Sybil, you are the reason for the breath in my lungs, you are what keeps my heart beating..." Ruby gave her body one more big squeeze before easing back, she could feel some stray tears still falling down her face and could only smile and chuckle lightly at the waterworks her mate had as well.
"Look at us, a pair of red noses and leaky faucets." She moved to touch and caress Sybil's cheek, her lover's body was warm to the touch, she smiled sweetly up at her, her thumb stroking her cheek tears and all, and finally moved to get up.
Standing straight then leaning a bit on the sink's counter, Ruby drew Sybil into her arms, she came willingly and Ruby felt at peace when Sybil wrapped her arms around her middle. Still petting her face, Ruby tilted her head back a fraction, staring into her mate's light doe eyes, the soft green was filled with hues of greens hazels and blues, a combination so light and almost unnoticeable until she was this close.
Ruby found her so beautiful, she sighed brushing her knuckles gently against her other cheek with her free hand, long lashes closing in pleasure before fluttering back open to stare deeply into Ruby's soul. "I love you Sybil..." She whispered shortening the distance of their faces, their noses brushed against one another, Ruby could feel and taste Sybil's sweet breath against her lips.
She wetted her lips in anticipation, trying to consume even her breath, before watching as Sybil closed her eyes once again, moving forward to complete the kiss of her own accord, soft pink lips pressed into hers, her scent filled Ruby's entire being, she threaded her fingers into Sybil's silky hair, returning the kiss breathing deeply, enjoying the feel of her mate.
Ruby kissed Sybil gently, their lips moving in a quiet dance of their own making, their hearts as one they could feel each other's feelings, their love for one another, through that sweet kiss, no rushing for they had all the time in the world.
After they were both fully content, Ruby drew back rubbing Sybil's soft lips with her finger before pressing a quick peck and smiling when she pulled all the way back. She wrapped her arm around Sybil's middle and urged her out from the bathroom, away from the smell of blood and her sins, and entering their little piece of heaven.
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Post by Thea on Aug 20, 2022 1:44:34 GMT -5
Normally, Sybil wouldn't have been able to stand having any part of the apartment dirty. The urge to clean was like bugs crawling over her skin, and the only way to get rid of them was to follow through with the compulsion. Tonight, however, she let the bathroom be and followed Ruby into the kitchen, where her tea and leftovers waited patiently. The tingles faded from her lips, but the feel of Ruby's mouth on hers was still fresh in her mind, causing her stomach to flip deliciously. As they walked, she interlocked her fingers with Ruby's that were on her side. Her body hummed in delight.
Sybil helped Ruby ease into a kitchen chair before she set to work retrieving the things she asked for a little bit ago. She had made chicken fried rice for dinner, and she remembered how disappointed she was when Ruby told her that she wouldn't be home in time for dinner. Seeing her girlfriend now, bandaged up, she felt guilty. Without effort, she fluffed the microwaved rice, releasing a wave of steam in the process. Good. It was still warm. And the tea should be cooled off enough to drink without burning Ruby's mouth in the process. Sybil hated that feeling and didn't want her partner to have to worry about it on top of her wounds. With a small smile, she set them before her and sat next to Ruby, leaning her cheek on a fist with an elbow on the table and just watched her in silence.
It wasn't a horrible silence. More like a companionable one. Sometimes, words weren't needed. And tonight was just one of those nights. Ruby did ask a few questions here and there. "Are you hungry?" No, just tired. "Do you want to go to bed?" Not unless Ruby was there. "Do you know where the soy sauce is?" In the fridge, Sybil will get it. Then Ruby complimented Sybil on her cooking, and Sybil waved her hand as if to wipe it from the air. Ruby was just trying to butter her up. The deer still wasn't used to compliments after all this time, but at least she wasn't downright refusing them as she had before.
Some more silence ensued, where Ruby had taken Sybil's other hand and rubbed her thumb along her knuckles. The sweeping motion lulled her into a sense of peace, the tingling sensation reminding her of the ebb and flow of the tide. Sybil heaved a sigh in contentment, smiling softly. Then she had a thought, something that she had been meaning to ask for a while now but never found the right time to do so.
There was no time like the present, she mused. Besides, she had already dropped the L-bomb when she wasn't ready. Might as well air the question. "Why is it every time we touch I feel all tingly?"
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Post by Ventia on Aug 30, 2022 22:08:22 GMT -5
The food was delicious as it always was whenever Sybil cooked, not only in taste and flavor but in the warmth and feelings that were prepared with it. As though Ruby could taste her love in every bite. Despite not really having been hungry and saying it just to ease Sybil's mood earlier the moment she did take a spoonful, Ruby's hunger awoke with a vengeance for her having waited this long to eat in the day.
She wondered briefly after how would she ever get by without one of Sybil's meals in the future but knew she wouldn't have to worry about that at all since Ruby didn't plan on separating from Sybil. Plus her own meals weren't half as good as Sybils, yes it was idiotic to even think she'd let her mate go.
Ruby was sipping on the warm tea, her plate cleared and holding Sybil's hand lovingly when that question finally came. Ruby hadn't mentioned it at all when she first felt them, for a number of reasons at that time, the main two had been that Sybil was still dating that bastard Lane and Ruby hadn't been ready for a real relationship-much less for her mate.
But fate had different plans and they were drawn together every chance they got until the day Ruby brought home her little deer. Now months later, Ruby couldn't see her life's meaning if Sybil wasn't by her side. She never wanted to go back to the time where she was alone.
Brushing her knuckles Ruby gave Sybil a knowing smile, "Oh these?" The tingles danced with every motion of her fingers, "Its called mate tingles, letting shifters know who their mates are with just a touch. I didn't want to overwhelm you when you first moved in and I probably didn't mention it after you agreed to date me because I didn't want you to have this affect your decision of having to stay with me if things didn't go well."
Ruby scooted a little closer so she could lift their joined hands and press a kiss to Sybil's wrist, where her pulse and tingles spiked at her touch before rubbing her cheek in Sybil's open palm. "But I don't think we'll have any problems in our relationship that we can't fix so I guess there's no harm in telling you now, I'm sorry for not saying anything before."
Ruby had been steadily teaching Sybil of their ways with the exception of the mate subject and after bringing her over to the Nightstar territory and having many family events, Ruby had assumed that someone had brought it up to Sybil by now, at least even to ask if they were actual mates and not just together because they loved each other, but it seemed like that hadn't been the case.
"How does that make you feel? Knowing we're mates?"
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Post by Thea on Sept 1, 2022 1:31:17 GMT -5
Sybil's head tilted to the side questioningly, brows raised slightly as she took the new information in. She was glad that Ruby answered her query and that she had a name for the phenomenon. Tingles were what it felt like, for sure. Sometimes it varied in intensity. Right now, they felt like a fizzy drink would on her tongue, but other days it felt like static or if she had stuck her finger in an electrical socket. Right now the sensation traveled past her wrist, lapping at her forearm.
The word "mate" was what had her stuck, though. Really, it shouldn't. She knew the definition of the word. And she's heard it often enough from Brook, Jewel, and Avery. Each one of the Constantine brothers was mated to them, but never had the tingling sensation been brought up, so she didn't think to associate the two. The tingles had to have been a shifter thing, however; she didn't feel them when she had been human. Looking back, though, she should have known that there was something more to it than that, because when she touched other shifters, she didn't feel tingly with them. It had always been only Ruby.
"I'm glad you didn't," she murmured softly. Did that make her a coward? Maybe. "If you did I probably would have run for the hills, and who knows how that would have affected our relationship." Sybil was naturally skittish, and the night she was turned she remembered screaming at Killian when he walked through the door. Not to mention she had been afraid of her own desires and what her parents taught her about them. Sinful, wrong. She had to overcome that before she could be close with Ruby, and if Ruby had dropped the bomb that they were ... mates? She wouldn't have put it past her to have bolted out the door.
Briefly, she imagined Ruby's reaction had it gone that way. And she didn't like what she saw. Her heart squeezed painfully, a sigh escaping her quietly. She became bolder the more time went on, but she still jumped at loud noises; couldn't watch scary movies; or be anywhere close to her brothers-in-law or her nephews without fearing the worst. That was one thing she hated about herself. How she couldn't just ... suck it up.
At Ruby's question, she shook her head to free herself from her self-loathing and hmmed thoughtfully. "Is it an evolutionary thing? Like, it pairs shifters based on genetic makeup or something? I mean, obviously I'm happy that we are - I wouldn't want it to be anyone else. But what makes a mate?" She's musing at this point, more intrigued at this point of the phenomenon than upset that Ruby kept the information from her. Should she have been? She was sure others would be, but she couldn't bring herself to be angry. "And does the tingling ever stop?"
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Post by Ventia on Sept 2, 2022 23:18:24 GMT -5
Ruby smiled, a little wave of relief washed over her with Sybil not being angry with her for not telling her sooner. She chuckled under her breath and planted another kiss to the middle of Sybil's palm. Humming lowly as Sybil started her musings, finding her girlfriend and mate as cute as ever as she let her inner thoughts out.
"I'm not too sure myself, older Packs might have some better insight to it, I've always seen it as one of Fate's playthings. Remember in Hercules they had those three old ladies, the Fates," another chuckle, " probably someone like that is just having a laugh. Even Gods can make mistakes which is why there's many failed mated pairings, I would assume the tingles stop once they get rejected and or both don't want to be together. I haven't had the balls to ask Nate that question yet, not that his ex mate is even around anymore so that helps."
Ruby paused, leaning back against the chair and continuing to stroke her knuckles, "Fate is good and all, it may have brought us together but I think ultimately its up to us to decide whether or not this is what we want. Free Will. I think its stronger than Fate. I think even if we didn't end up as mates, I would have still stuck around to bother you until you agreed to date me, which is exactly what happened." Ruby smirked, giving Sybil a little wink, as she stared lovingly at her.
"Whatever it is, I'm happy that we are too. It's not something you got to think too hard on, I do think we can start working on our bond though. I can feel that its there but its not as open as how my brothers describe it. Which I'm fine with, but you never know when we might need it. Killian thinks if he had a deeper and more open bond with Brook he could have probably found her faster when she got kidnapped."
"I don't like the thought of not knowing where you are in case something like that happens, that said how can we make it more open? I'm not too sure either, and it doesn't help that Killian said that it was only after that whole incident that he started to get a feel for where Brooklyn was. Which is major aggravating." Ruby shook her head, with their confessions she could feel a little more from Sybil but it was still a few steps away from where she wanted it to be.
"Anyway any other questions you've been holding out on me? You can ask me anything, you don't have to hold back with me anymore Sybil.'
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Post by Thea on Sept 11, 2022 16:35:06 GMT -5
Sybil was disappointed. Not at Ruby, mind, because it wasn't her girlfriend's - mate's? - fault that she didn't have a definitive answer. Her lips tilted downward in a frown, paying attention once more to how her body responded to Ruby. The "failed mated pairings" bit was intriguing, however! At first, she guessed that the tingles matched two people based on their ability to sire optimal offspring. But given that her mate was not male, Sybil scratched that out almost immediately.
Then as Ruby talked about gods and the Fates and how even they made mistakes - which totally went against what she had grown up to believe - her eyes went wide and her mouth formed a small "o" of surprise. She liked the idea of the mating tingles being no more than a suggestion, because if it wasn't she would have worried that her feelings truly weren't her own at all, just a byproduct of this phenomenon. That expression became even more pronounced when Ruby brought up Nate's "ex-mate". The wink had her blushing, causing her lips to close into a small, smitten smile.
Ruby had that effect on her, still. Still, she had to ask, "Nate had an ex-mate? Not Jewel, right? No. They look at each other as if there's no one else for them. Nate loved someone before her?" It almost seemed ... blasphemous. In the limited times she's seen Jewel with Nate it was as if they were the epitome of what the mate tingles should invoke. What god made the mistake of pairing Nathaniel with someone else? Had it been the same with Jewel? Did she have an ex-mate?
The more Ruby tried to explain, the more her brain thought of questions. It was like a machine that was overworking itself, trying to gain more input so that it could finish the final product but whatever it was churning out was lackluster at best. She was about to say to Ruby that it was already too late - that she was thinking too hard and giving herself a headache in doing so - but stopped herself. "A bond?" she asked, perking up at that. Then her eyes widened in shock and fear. "Kidnapped?!"
Brook reminded her of an Amazon warrior - tall, curvaceous, and looking like she could totally kill someone with a flick of her wrist. The looks she sent Killian when he did something that she didn't approve of definitely made Sybil glad that it wasn't possible to murder someone simply by looking at them. It doesn't help that Brooklyn is a cop and can shift into something with wicked sharp claws and teeth. Who in their right mind would kidnap Brooklyn?
Ruby's next words caused a shiver of fear to go through her body. She knew that the shifter world was dangerous. Some days it overwhelmed her to think that she was forcefully dragged into it, and ended up wondering if things would be different had she never met Lane. Then she thought of what Ruby said earlier, about free will and how Ruby would have still pestered her if she never felt the tingles. Her shoulders sagged, feeling the effects of staying up so late suddenly. Somehow, she felt that it was her destiny to be a shifter - it didn't matter how, but everything happened for a reason, right? She was just glad that her place was beside Ruby.
Which reminded her ...
"Jewel said something about ... marks. I think that was the word she used."
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Post by Ventia on Sept 22, 2022 20:05:40 GMT -5
Ruby chuckled lightly, her lips stretched into a lazy fond smile as she watched Sybil and her open face full of emotions. She was happy that Sybil was taking the news good for the most part, the time she had to get used to the shifter world with her family was probably the main reason why her lovely mate wasn't freaking out so much. Good, because Ruby wasn't that great at calming down situations although she seemed to do just fine with Sybil.
"It's a touchy subject but yeah." Ruby confirmed it, nodding again to the bond comment and then laughing lightly at the kidnaped one. Though for all her carefree manner, a slight frown came into place on her face, her thoughts spiraling out in all directions. First touching base at the mate subject, there were many guesses about it but little was really known about how that process went down. She didn't like the thought of not being mates with Sybil, but then what about Nate and Jewel? They were such a perfect pair together they should have been mates. Was it because their timelines didn't cross at the predestined moment as it was supposed to, so their fates branched out selecting other individuals as their mates for the sake of evolution?
She paused, Nate had died when he wasn't fated to, what if Ruby hadn't decided to go into that convivence store that day? Would she had missed her chance to be with Sybil? Her mate's warmth in her hand and the little buzz of tingles tried to reassure her, to not think of such things. Still it was bizarre and something nagged in Ruby's gut that there was something important here-a secret that could be the key to unlocking everything.
Like the bond.
Even now Ruby reached for it, a thin link between Sybil and herself, even to her who had been aware of her shifter bloodline since Ruby could remember it was still a thing of mystery. She's never cared about someone else until now, at least not in a romantic way, her exes were barely worth remembering much less mentioning and feeling a shared bond with. She wanted to explore their bond but didn't know where to start or how. Her family wasn't that much of a help either though she would still be calling them when she had a free moment. Because the last thing she wanted was something to happen to Sybil and not doing anything about it until it was too late. It was why she was already waiting with eager fingers for her packages to come in, wondering why she hadn't done this before.
Ruby bit her lip, a warm heat steadily growing with all the mate bond and marking talk. She was amazed that she had resisted for so long, her main priority was to not make Sybil uncomfortable with anything. But still, having her mate so close and still not bearing her mark and vise versa was nerve wracking, hell even wanting to mark someone was driving Ruby insane, she never had any desires to do it with anyone else, yet with Sybil it was the complete opposite.
"It's what we do when we want to lay claim to what's ours. It's permanent, leaving a visual outline of our beast's imprint." She lifted her free hand, tilting her neck a little to the side exposing her skin, her finger sliding down the curve of her skin feeling sensitive as she paused just below her jugular.
"Right here usually." She tapped the spot, her gaze brightening with the yellow Constantine color, watching Sybil intently. "It can help develop the bond further as well, in Nate's and Jewel's case it created one between them. It really is mysterious, the magic behind our origins I am getting quite interested in learning more." Ruby mused in a tone that usually got her into trouble.
"But back to the juicier bit, has that been on your mind? Marking me?" She teased in that low heated voice that Sybil liked so much, the gleam in her eyes letting her mate know she liked the idea just as much or maybe more as well.
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